There seems to be as many step-parents as biological now, so should step-parents be hands off when it comes to disapline?
When I moved in with my now second husband I had 2 sons and he had one living with him.
At first, my new partner said that he didn’t think that it was his place to discipline my children as he wasn’t their father, but we soon realised that this wasn’t practical, as we were all living under the same roof we needed respect from the children and they needed boundaries to feel safe.
On the whole we all got along quite well, I’m not saying that we didn’t have any issues, of coruse we did.
I recall one time when I asked my step-son not to behave in a certain way and he told me ” You can’t tell me what to do, you’re not my mum just someone who lives with us.” That same afternoon he asked if I would ring his mum and have a word on his behalf((as they had fallen out) I reminded him that as I was just someone who lived with them surely I wasn’t qualified to do this, he immediately apologised and it was never mentioned again.
In fact his mother told me that she had told her son that he was lucky to have such a good step-mum!
My two son’s from my first marriage are now both step-parents and have told me that they have been inspired to do this from the way that my 2nd husband raised them with me.
Always remember that children are the most important part of a family.
Blended families here
I have written on co-parenting here
Being a step-parent can be hard at times, but if you work at it it;s worth the effort.
As always questions and comments are welcome.
Until next time.
Karen
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This is a great piece on a complicated subject. I know friends who have felt accepted and included through being disciplined by their step parents and maybe played up a bit to start with just to test whether they were part of the family. But they now feel loved and lucky to have multiple parents. #StayClassyMama
I think you can’t really live in the same house if you don’t have house rules and really anyone can disapline anyone if they break them. I do also think, aren’t the rules really there because you love them? As teenagers, I imagine it becomes a little harder….
That’s exactly it, we do it because we love them, thanks for stopping by
Of course, if you all live together then It becomes impossible not to all be involved in discipline. But I should imagine it’s tricky to start with. #StayClassyMama
I have been through this with my now husband. The kids have no contact with their biological father so Chris is their dad. He treats all three equally and doesn’t see himself as ‘step’ Thanks for linking up with #globalblogging
That’s great, Thanks for stopping by and sharing
I think each family dynamic needs to be negotiated and the (step) parents need to agree on boundaries. Thanks for linking up with #stayclassymama
I have a step parent and because of the family dynamic and me not living at home for long when that relationship happened, so he hasn’t really parented me, although we have a good relationship and always have as adults. I think it entirely depends on each family and the dynamic and how they want to work it. #stayclassymama
I am a step father to 2 girls. It is tricky, but I agree for it to work the step parent has to he involved with the discipline. I’ve been in my step daughters lives since a very young age so it is like the norm. My step daughters and my daughters are all treated equally.
That’s great to hear, Eddie, thanks for sharing