When I was working as a registered child minder I looked after a little girl who wore calipers on her legs to walk, she could only wear them for short periods as otherwise they made her skin sore. Her mother asked me to put them on and remove them throughout her time with me.
When we visited a toddler group , the other children were fascinated by the calipers and wanted to know all about them: ” Why was I putting them on?” ” Why did she need them” I explained the best that I could and everyone had a great afternoon playing together. Another child I cared for used makaton signs as a way of communicating along with her limited vocabulary, when she signed “thank you” after taking an offered biscuit and I gave her a thumbs up to say “good girl” the other children asked why we did this. I explained that she couldn’t hear as well as them because her ears didn’t work well enough, one little boy spent the rest of the morning staring at her ears
.
When a child needed to use a spacer to breathe in his asthma medication, we all counted the 10 breathes that he had to take together.
When he had finished a child who had been watching asked if she could have a turn next, she became quite annoyed when I told her that she didn’t need his medicine!
I was already disabled after stroke when my grandson came along, when he was about 3 years old he loved to sit on my knee when I used my electric scooter, he would take hold of my stroke effected hand( which was always in a clenched fist) and he would gently massage it and encourage it to open, which it sometimes did, a little.
Another time when I was out, without my grandson, a boy came up to me and asked about my scooter’s joystick control
.
He watched with his dad as I demonstrated how I used it to manoeuvre the vehicle, he was truly amazed and requested that I did it again and again.
A parent who I used to child mind for and her son visited me when I was discharged from hospital after having a benign brain tumour removed, the boy who was about 5 wanted to know all about how the tumour had been taken out.
After checking with his mum I explained about the operation. he looked at me wide-eyed and said, ” Were you screaming, Karen?” When I replied that I hadn’t felt a thing because I was asleep, he was extremely disappointed and told me. ” I thought you would be yelling as the blood ran into your eyes!”
A few years later a neighbours children were playing in their garden as I passed on my scooter, they asked why I needed it and why I couldn’t walk. When I told them that I had suffered a stroke, they wanted to know what that meant, there grandfather had survived a heart attack, so I told them that a stroke is similar but it happened in my brain and not my heart, they were happy with my exclamation.
I believe in answering children’s questions about disability and illness as honestly as possible.
Children will sometimes stare; which really doesn’t bother me- but it does bother some parents who are embarrassed by this. I remember going through a shopping centre with my husband pushing my wheelchair ; a boy was walking past while having a good look at us, his father told him to stop staring then he walked straight into the path of another wheelchair user.
Child minders and other early years practitioners should display posters of people with different disabilities so that children get used to seeing it.
My youngest son attended a small village school where there were several children with various special needs, so my son and the child minded children who came with me on school runs became very familiar with seeing ‘different’ children.
My Ofsted inspector seemed impressed by this when I was questioned on this subject.
As always comments, questions and topic suggestions are welcome, please share on social media if you think others would like to read this.
Until next time.
Karen
x
Jamie Sumner writes amazing middle grade novels from the perspective of kids with disabilities, and she does it as mum with a young (and very sweet) child who is learning to manage multiple physical challenges.
I think it is a wonderful thing to be honest with children about disabilities and also to recognize that they don’t think with the distrust, fear, and cynicism of adults. They are genuinely curious and the more we answer their questions the more informed they are and maybe, just maybe, they won’t become distrustful, fearful and cynical adults. I think this is really great to write about and get the knowledge out there. #AnythingGoes
I worked for two decades teaching blind kids in a residential setting. When my kids were young I made them volunteer there. They gained a unique view and respect for those who are visually impaired/blind and an education that their peers did not have for people with disablilites. #ablogginggoodtime.
we always encourage people to ask the questions they want when they meet our daughter, the boys still get wound up when they encounter people staring and get quite defensive about it (they are all adults now) I find myself staring often but out of wonder if it’s someone we know through our daughter #stayclassymama
It can be tricky to make sure that children react sensitively to disability when it can be quite frightening. There are several children at my children’s schools with disabilites so that helps to normalise the experience, however we recently visited a care home with diasbled people and my children found it quite traumatic. Thanks for linking up with #globalblogging
Children comprehend information far better than we give them credit for. We should definitely explain disabilities to children more honestly and open #stayclassymama
Thanks for linking up with #stayclassymama
My mother in law worked with children with disabilites and my husband has always been very proactive in making sure our son understands that not all children are the same as he is. Thank you for sharing this with #TriumphantTales. Do come back next week!