The first time that I heard of a man suffering with post natal depression (P.N.D.)was when a father of multiples admitted to it on a television programme that I was watching.
It may seem strange to think that a new father can get post natal depression as it is usually associated with woman who have recently given birth. More and more men are opening up about feeling depressed after the birth of their baby.
There is a lot of help offered to woman plus midwives, health visitors and doctors are trained to look out for signs of it happening in mothers but not so much in new fathers.
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The main problem as I see it is that men don’t like to admit that they may have a problem to others, or even to themselves.
Men like to think that they are macho and may see P.N.D. as being weak, also I don’t think men discuss things with each other in the way that woman do.
Many people think that a male can’t suffer with P.N.D. because it is related to the hormones that a woman has after birth, but this is not necessarily the case. Tiredness and feeling generally overwhelmed can contribute to feeling depressed.
If anyone: male or female thinks that they may be suffering from post natal depression it is vital that they don’t suffer in silence , speak to health professionals as soon as possible there is help available and no one will think badly of you. The more men that talk about this sensitive subject, the quicker P.N.D. will be recognised in new fathers, as well as new mothers.
I would like to thank Stu Gaunt, Jade Marie Ryan and Kirsty Butland (who have no connection with P.N.D.) for allowing me to use their photographs.
I would be interested to hear from anyone who has experience of post natal depression in men.
As always questions, comments and topic suggestions are welcome.
Until next time.
Karen
x
Thank you for sharing. I really had no idea that at a male can suffer with P.N.D before reading this!
#GlobalBlogging
I guess part of the problem is people associate PND as being to do with the physical changes a womans body goes through after pregnancy. Whereas the huge mental inpact if having a child and the responsibility that comes with that is felt equally by both parents and can of course lead to depression in fathers.
A really interesting post. Thanks for sharing #MixItUp
Not sure i fully agree with your comments about men being too macho, i think they may just not always recognise PND as something they could be affected by. But great to raise awareness #anythinggoes
Sorry, Phil, I didn’t mean to cause offence, just going by experience, thanks for your thoughts
I think this is a societal problem – I can’t speak for all men, but many don’t “like to think” they are macho, rather society expects them to be.
Men don’t cry, stiff upper lip, etc.
In just the same way you could say something is a “woman’s job” or that women are “emotional”.
Neither are really true. Both men and women need to be allowed, and expected, to have feelings and express emotion – including concerns – and provided with support when they do.
I’d argue too that the main problem is not that men don’t want to admit it. It is that men don’t want to admit it BECAUSE they will be ostracised for doing so.
You have some great thoughts, Phil, thanks again for sharing x
I accept men may suffer from depression after a baby is born but I think it should have its own definition and the term post-natal should only apply to women. I say this as someone who had the condition myself and got little support from my partner or anyone else for that matter so I may well have a skewed view. #AnythingGoes
I agree with you Katie, that actually makes a lot of sense, sorry to hear about your P.N.D. thanks for sharing your story x
It’s certainly not something I hear people talking about, so great to raise awareness. I suspect my husband had it a bad, he was having a hard time at work the first few weeks and was a bit withdrawn, and I was too stressed my self to be much helph, but luckily it only lasted a few weeks
#twinklytuesday
I’ve never heard of male post partum depression and many men I know wouldn’t want to admit it if they experienced. #keepingitreal
Important thing to bring awareness to. I don’t think that the depression men can feel is exactly the same as traditional PND, because I think that is a lot about the hormones, but as you say lack of sleep and the stresses of a new baby can easily lead one down a dark path that can be difficult to get out of. There is a certain helplessness that I think a lot of men suffer from in those days #anythinggoes
I didn’t know this was something people are talking and thinking about, but it does not surprise me because my poor husband had to put up with ME when our babies were tiny, and all those hormones flying around the house wear on everyone!
It really isn’t something talked about but I can understand. Of course depression can happen to anyone and anything can trigger it. My ex husband was prone to depression anyway and when I had our two babies he was really strange for months afterwards. We had two babies in just over a year and by the time the youngest was 6 months old he’d left us because he couldn’t cope. He did come back, but looking back now I think he probably had PND.
Thanks for sharing your story x
It really is a thing. Thankfully I’ve never suffered but my husband did after our triplets, I was left feeling like he had become the 7th child in our family. Looking back I think it was hard as he lost my time with our 6 kids under 6. Those triplets are now 14 and our eldest 20. We survived it all but it took a lot of working through the early years. #TwinklyTuesday
I think men can, when you think there world is turned upside down and they are often shut out from it all too (the mother becomes very baby focused). The often get the bad bits without the good bits! Good post #TwinklyTuesday
It’s hardly ever talked about but it is real. Thank you for highlighting about it X #twinklytuesday
I think it’s important to recognise that the mental well-being of both parents can really suffer after the birth of a baby. In the end it’s all about creating a space where Mums and Dads canexpress how they feel and get help when they need it. Thanks for linking this with #ItsOK xxx
Mental health is an issue that doesn’t discriminate based on gender, but you are very right that we need to talk about it more, as well as offer support to those who are struggling! Thanks for linking up to the #itsok linky. Hope you join us again next week.
A really important thing to highlight Karen. And thanks for sharing with #AllSortsofBlogs
I think it’s important to shine a light on this important topic. Thanks xx #thesatsesh
This is such an important topic. Dads are so easily overlooked when it comes to PND. Thank you for sharing with #Blogstravaganza
Such an important topic to discuss, Dads are easily overlooked in those early days. Thanks for linking up #twinklytuesday
great to see continued awareness on this topic! I think men have such a harder time being open about Mental health issues in general, but with PND it can be met with very cruel responses from uneducated people! good on you! Thanks for linking up this week with #ABloggingGoodTime