This is a subject that I have experience of:-
We are a blended family read more herehttps://thenextbestthingtomummy.com/?s=blended+families.
I and my husband both have children from a previous marriage; our boys never called the step parent mum or dad as they all had an absent parent who they saw regularly. If a stranger who wasn’t aware of our situation referred to us as mum or dad the children went along with it- I think they found this easier than having to explain that we weren’t their mum or dad.
I it has to be a personal choice that suits individuals, I guess if a child no longer has contact with a biological parent they may feel differently towards the step parent. Absent parents here.
I had a friend who when she divorced her children’s father and moved her new boyfriend in with her and the children she told the children to call the boyfriend daddy and their ‘real’ dad by his first name; the children were very young and became so confused that they later needed counselling from an expert.
Step parents may struggle with bonding with step children here .
Please share any thoughts and experiences on this topic.
As always questions and comments are welcome.
Until next time
Karen
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Great subject. I am a Step Dad to 2 girls, all in all between me and my partner we have 5 girls.
I see them as my own daughters and all 5 girls are treated equally. They were both very young when I entered there lives and its the norm for them with the routine we have. Weekends with daddy and time with us. We have never told them to call me daddy or dad, that have asked if they could which I let them know I was comfortable with them calling me what ever they wanted to and felt comfortable with (I am still Eddie). It was the grandparents that were confusing but now they are older my parents (step grandparents I suppose) are granny and grandad to them and are comfortable calling them that.
It’s the same with my eldest daughter from a previous relationship. She calls my partner by her first name but her parents grandma and grandpa (mum and step dad) and her dad grandad.
Thanks for sharing your experience, Eddie, which sounds very similar to the way things worked with my blended family
Some parents can make it extremely awkward in a Blended Families circumstances when there is no need to.
Absolutely, Eddie, it’s worth the effort with all children, regardless of whether they are biological or step children
I love the topics you bring up on your blog!
In my opinion, if a child feels they want to call their step parent mum or dad and its ok with their parent and the step parent then why not? Clearly the child feels close enough to the step parent to want to do this.
Ah! Thanks Claire, yes, that’s about it hoping you come back soon to read more posts
It tough one as really depends on the situation, I don’t think there is a right or wrong answer and it is up to the person choosing what makes them feel comfortable X #anythinggoes
You just hit the nail on the head, thanks for stopping by
This is a tough one because every blended family is so different.
Absolutely, Michele, thanks for taking the time to read
It’s not about the name, it’s the relationship. My eldest, my step son, calls me Suzanne, but introduces me as his mum, his wife refers to me as mum also. His relationship with his biological mother is non existent. the other 3 boys, refer to us both as ‘the parents’ The youngest also calls me Suzanne, the other 2 mum, as for their biological father, one has nothing to do with him, the others refer to him as Dad, but use his first name to talk to me and my husband about him just tell people their parents live abroad and they have 4 siblings. Thanks for joining in with #pocolo and hope to see you back again soon
I totally agree that it is a personal choice, thanks for sharing your experience, Suzanne
Great topic, thanks for sharing!
Just a hard subject as every blended family is different and everyone works as what better works for them. The main thing is to keep the children in good health physically and mentally.
#alittlebitofeverything