A recent programme on television showed parents who have 3 children and believe that their children don’t need any rules: they do what they want, when they want. The mother sleeps with the youngest child in her bed.
The children don’t have set bedtimes; they go to bed when they feel that they are tired enough to sleep.
I personally think that bedtime routines here
are essential as children need a good sleep to be able to develop and learn.
As for meal times; the children eat what they want, when they chose and where they want to eat it- even in the bedroom.
I have written on fussy eaters here
The father of the family said that he has memories of childhood when he was told to do something when he was having fun doing something else, which he doesn’t want for his children; hence the lack of rules.
I am not knocking this way of parenting completely, as every family is different, but I do think that this lifestyle have a negative impact when the children become adults – how many employers are going to let employees come and go at work as they please?
Child led play here and more here is fantastic, but child led parenting, I’m not so sure.
If you feel that children do need their behaviour managed read here
Please share any thoughts and experiences.
Until next time.
Karen
x
Oh I so agree there has to be some sort of routine in any household, imagine how tired a child would be if they went to bed whenever. You’ve made a good point about employers. Another great blog .
Thanks. Pearl
I believe if parents want to parent in this way then carry on but what they and their children need to understand and adhere to is that it only happens within their home and that rules apply outside their family unit
Totally agree, Clare, it would be a nightmare for any teacher or early years practitioners, if the children thought they could have no rules in other places
I’m all for a few house rules with children, it makes the teenage years more managable #KCACOLS
Definitely need boundaries with teenagers!
I definitely need rules . This house would be even more nuts than usual without !! #globalblogging
Not sure how anyone survives in a house with no rules!
I saw that programme advertised and couldn’t watch because I knew I’d be screaming at the TV. Everyone, children and adults alike, need rules to live by. Part of parenting is to prepare your little darling for the big wide world and what awaits them out there, which will largely be a big old set of rules they will have to adhere to if they want to have any kind of income. Even as a self employed person, I have to adhere to laws. I may not feel like doing my tax return because it’s not ‘fun’, but the bottom line is, I have to! Boundaries, also help children to make sense of the world…rant over 😉 x
#AnythingGoes
wow, my mom would never go for that lol
I am in two minds to be honest. I don’t believe any parent gets if completely right and too many wan to preach to others that they do. We don’t have many rules and the children are lovely people with good values and a love of learning. Just not sure either way really #StayClassyMama
Wow. I cannot understand how this can work. Surely there must be some discipline? No, it wouldnt work for me. #KCACOLS
I don’t set a lot of rules for my children but I do have very specific rules that I know will always apply outside the home. Like being respectful of others. Setting boundaries is so very important for children to learn and my kids are now teens but I still make sure they’re in bed by a certain time during the week. They need a good night’s sleep for school the next day, which my youngest is still struggling with it seems but we are working on it. Children need rules. They don’t have to be a lot of rules but here needs to be some basic ones at the very least, in order to teach children about the world around them. #GlobalBlogging
Surely children need rules as guidance on how to behave, how to look after themselves, how to be healthy etc. Rules aren’t there to spoil their fun, they’re there to prepare them for later life and to help them to live the best life they can. If they don’t have to follow any rules at all, how on earth are they going to function as adults? It’s probably best I didn’t watch that programme or I’d be mad!! #stayclassymama
I’ve been watching this series but haven’t watched this episode. I think a lack of rules isn’t necessarily the issue but rather a lack of guidance if things are as they appear on face value from this post and snippets I’ve seen about “that” episode. Our house is based more on explaining why we do things the way we do as opposed to strict and rigid rules and routines.
Did you know they are proud anti-vaxers too. I’ll leave it there.
Thanks for linking up to #kcacols
Its not for me to judge how another parents but I have to say, its rules and routines for us. #TwinklyTuesday
Totally agree with many comments here… A house with no rules will be a crazy house at the end of the day. Setting up some rules is a must for us and I believe it also build up our kiddos with guidelines for a bright future. Thanks for sharing this post with us at #alittlebitofeverything.
I have 3 children and they never agree on anything so this would never work. They would bicker constantly and try to ‘out-do’ each other. We have routines and they work well. Parenting is to prepare for life in the future and set boundaries. Thanks for linking up with #stayclassymama
A routine def works for us here! The minute the boy is tired, it all goes wrong!
I definitely couldn’t cope with no rules parenting. I think children like to have boundaries and rules. It makes them feel secure. #KCACOLS
I do think routines & boundaries are important, and I don’t allow eating anywhere other than at the table. That said our youngest sleeps in our bed so who am I to judge! #KCACOLS
If it works for you and your family, why not? Thanks for sharing